Why do I educate at home?

I don’t exactly remember how it all started to grow in my head. I think my son’s non adapting to the nursery had a great impact on me. When he was 3¹/₂ I decided to send him to a nursery for 3h a day. The nursery was close by and it was islamic how I preferred. I hoped  to give him an opportunity to socialise with other kids and not only with his 2 younger sisters at home. For more than a month he used to stay by the door for entire 3h waiting for me. He wouldn’t move to the centre of the room until one day the teachers decided to take him there by force. He went and would sit wherever they told him but still wouldn’t interact with anyone. He wasn’t talking to the kids nor to the teachers. His only interaction was nodding his head to say yes and no. And this lasted from September till February (!) I said enough is enough. Why should I cause him a trauma in his early years just for the sake of a (forced) socialisation? We, his parents, are at home, his 2 sisters are at home so why he needs to be “exiled”? What he must have thought about all this? How he must have felt? Unwanted? Pushed aside?...

Those days are finished alhamdulillah and they pushed me towards home education. I started researching, consulting other home educating mothers and thinking thinking thinking... until I came to a strong conclusion that this is the best for my family and this is what I want not only for my son but for all of my children.

Feeling responsible as a parent

Probably it is the most important factor for me in deciding to choose this path of education. I feel this is a natural path like those first couple of years when the child grows and learns at home, it’s just that I choose to prolong it :) Who said the child NEEDS to go to school? Learning at home is a legal option and I am just taking advantage of this choice. I feel responsible for my own children to the point I want to be their main authority, teacher, facilitator, friend. I want to take that responsibility on myself instead of giving it away to strangers whose values are not known to me. And it is not that I want to be the ONLY but THE MAIN educator and the person whom they may trust and seek acceptance and consolation from. I want to be always there for them unlike a school teacher who needs to be there for many children at the time. I feel the responsibility of helping my kids to learn is mine and not the school’s or the government’s.

Is it because we are religious?

Often people believe that religious people (mainly practising christians or muslims) want to home educate to isolate the kids from an outside world of immorality. There is some truth in it and maybe for some families this is the main reason to educate at home. (Mine is the one mentioned above about responsibility although they're both related.) However we all know that it is completely impossible to isolate your children from all the evil in this world unless you keep them locked in one room without tv, internet and phone :) It is all about minimising the bad influence. It is like moving from the city to the village side not to be bombarded with too many stimulus and lead a more peaceful life. (Do you like this comparison? :) came in my mind just now).

These days schools teach different values not necessarily in compliance with the God’s word. And we, conscious muslims and also Christians can see it very clearly. Yes, there are good faith schools available but again, the responsibility over my children wins. Or simply the time is saved for the benefit of all the family, the relationships between the parents and children and between the sibblings are cherrished and stronger bonds are being formed. Besides not all the children are angels even if they are in a faith school :) and I personally try my best to avoid any kind of bullying.

Every child is different and learns differently

I’ve read somewhere that the school is for children who are average. The weaker ones struggle and are under the pressure to catch up with the better ones and those beyond average are bored and often their light of exploring new things is being extinguished. Educating at home gives me opportunity to approach each child individually, helping them to learn the way it is most effective because it is according to their abilities. I know my children better than anyone else. I know what they are capable of and I can give them as much time as they need to acquire a new skill or to study a certain topic.

School kills the will to learn – also my own experience

I wouldn’t want to write too much in here about it as I’m already planning to share with you a longer story on a similar topic. I just wanted to point it out as this is also one of many reasons why I educate my children at home.

Someone said that kids are fast learners, curious of the world, creative until... they go to school. For many kids this is the end of joyful exploring. They stop being eager to learn because of a simple fact that now it becomes a must, they are under pressure to follow the curriculum and need to adapt to the teachers pace who also are under pressure to execute the curriculum. So everyone is under pressure, chasing time and most don’t really enjoy it. If you do something on your own will you learn naturally and faster, if someone forces you to do something, you often end up hating it. I did start to be frustrated and hating what should be a pleasure for me during my school years. Till today I only research things that I’m interested in, I learn new things on my own pace and I resist forced and under pressure learning.

Practical advantages

I don’t need to get up early in the morning to prepare the kids for school and take them there and back no matter the weather.

We can visit our family, friends, go for trips whenever we feel like it and not only during holidays, half terms or weekends, avoiding crowds or more expensive high season tickets and fees yeay! :)

If you’re here it means you’ve read all my thoughts and it was probably interesting if you lasted till the end.

Thank you:)

PS. I must say I don't really like the title of this post. It sounds like we are locked at home all the time. I don't actually educate only at home but also outside, in the garden, in the park, in town, on a trip, anywhere really :) I felt it was good to clarify this.